This one can only be brought out for the biggies. For the request to end all requests. For the begging and pleading that can never be asked again. You can only give once, as your reason for asking such a hugely important, life altering request, that your child has to comply….because you gave birth to them.
Unless you are me. I remember the first time I said it. I was near death from pneumonia and was being lovingly tended to by my child….or I couldn’t reach my coffee. I can’t remember which. The conversation went something like this…
Me: Can you please blah blah blah blah?
Child: No, Mom, not now.
Child: Haha very funny, but no.
Me: This isn’t funny. I asked you to do it, now do it.
Child: Oh for heaven’s sake, Mom, do it yourself!
Me: But I gave birth to you.
Child: *sigh* That is NOT fair.
Me: Thank you.
You think I went to THAT well again? Yes. Yes I did. I’m pretty sure I used it on a different kid. And, to be honest, they weren’t exactly small when I pulled out the use-it-once-and-never-use-it-again-line. Probably younger than 20. Probably. But I do remember trying it a second time. I got an answer like “Seriously? *sigh* oh all right.”
And then again (big mistake here….I tried it with the same kid; so hard to keep track) “Really???? Mom, c’mon. Oh all right” *sigh* *eye rolling.*
Now, when I ask for a favor, a request, a please-hand-me-something, and get the pathetic look on my face, my children say “ABSOLUTELY NOT, I DON’T CARE THAT YOU GAVE BIRTH TO ME I’M NOT HANDING YOU YOUR COFFEE! Oh, okay.” *sigh*
And for all of our craziness and our funny interactions, I will love my kids forever.
Because I gave birth to them.
p.s. This baby picture is from my baptism. My cousin calls it my Baby Count Dracula picture. My children should have realized what was in store for them…..because I gave birth to them.