This one can only be brought out for the biggies. For the request to end all requests. For the begging and pleading that can never be asked again. You can only give once, as your reason for asking such a hugely important, life altering request, that your child has to comply….because you gave birth to them.
Unless you are me. I remember the first time I said it. I was near death from pneumonia and was being lovingly tended to by my child….or I couldn’t reach my coffee. I can’t remember which. The conversation went something like this…
Me: Can you please blah blah blah blah?
Child: No, Mom, not now.
Me: Pleeeeeeeeeease?
Child: Haha very funny, but no.
Me: This isn’t funny. I asked you to do it, now do it.
Child: Oh for heaven’s sake, Mom, do it yourself!
Me: But I gave birth to you.
Child: *sigh* That is NOT fair.
Me: Thank you.
You think I went to THAT well again? Yes. Yes I did. I’m pretty sure I used it on a different kid. And, to be honest, they weren’t exactly small when I pulled out the use-it-once-and-never-use-it-again-line. Probably younger than 20. Probably. But I do remember trying it a second time. I got an answer like “Seriously? *sigh* oh all right.”
And then again (big mistake here….I tried it with the same kid; so hard to keep track) “Really???? Mom, c’mon. Oh all right” *sigh* *eye rolling.*
Now, when I ask for a favor, a request, a please-hand-me-something, and get the pathetic look on my face, my children say “ABSOLUTELY NOT, I DON’T CARE THAT YOU GAVE BIRTH TO ME I’M NOT HANDING YOU YOUR COFFEE! Oh, okay.” *sigh*
And for all of our craziness and our funny interactions, I will love my kids forever.
Because I gave birth to them.
p.s. This baby picture is from my baptism. My cousin calls it my Baby Count Dracula picture. My children should have realized what was in store for them…..because I gave birth to them.
saneteachers 
Sounds like your baptism was as eventful as mine! Apparently I drank so much milk that day, that when it was my turn to be baptized I let out a huge burp and the entire church heard me.
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lol I’ve always thought that I look like I was saying “Dear God, don’t leave me with THIS family!”
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haha you do. Or “The food just arrived?” You should have a caption contest for this photo.
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*sigh* Another great idea I have to credit you for.
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Now I’m trying to figure out how to do it. Hmmm…..what should be the prize?
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You’re asking the right guy for ideas. Choose one:
-An internet high five
-A blog post congratulating the winner
-A heartfelt “Congratulations, you win!”
-A “like” of the persons comment
-Send them a package
-Offer to buy them a coffee if you’re ever in their country
-Bragging rights
-A pair of socks
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cellphone service to Canada
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That works!
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Btw I have a new post up for you.
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OH good! But first I have to post the idea that you gave me which is awesome, and that I had to AGAIN give you credit for. People will think I’m your blogging moll.
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I wonder, what would your response be to “I didn’t ask to be born”?
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“Go to your room”
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I hope that you realize this is all in fun. But I do say that to my children (who are all adults). I haven’t pulled that on my grandchildren yet. It loses something when the next generation is added.
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Yes, I know 😉
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Phew
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I think if you have a card you need to play it, whenever and wherever you can. You just need to keep track of who you played it with…:)
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Exactly!
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“Baby Count Dracula” Hahaha. Now that is funny!
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Yes, and I wish I could t make credit for it. For some strange reason, my cousin ended up with my cute baptism photo. I ended up with Baby Count Dracula.
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As a father, life denied me access to that line – so I tried the next best line – only once.
Me: Listen up, I wiped your little bottom for two years.
My Loving Child: Yeah old man, and I will probably have to wipe yours for longer than that.
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Haha…a horrible look into our future!
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Ha! My mother does this same thing to me all the time. You people are evil.
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Lol. But we love you..
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Hilarious! You could make a compilation of parents’ come-back remarks based on your experience when kids retort. You know..Just for inspiration I can use on my kids!!! 😉 Sometimes, I run out of things to take away from them…Grrrr!
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Great idea! We have to be very creative 😆
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