What else could go wrong…or God’s sense of humor.

I’m writing this in the heat of passion. Before common sense kicks in.  Before I can change my mind.  Here goes……my higher power has a sense of humor.

You know when someone says a joke and you are the brunt of it and it isn’t funny to you at all, although everyone else is laughing?  This is just like that.  But maybe in 33 years it will be funny?  But maybe not.  This is just like that.

I first clued in to this little secret many years ago when I was 27.  I had gotten way too involved in church stuff and baby stuff and life stuff and family stuff and and and (I’m the woman who always knocks people out of the way to yell “I’LL DO IT”), and wanted to spend more time at home because one has to have a clean house occasionally at all times, and I wanted to hang out just with my baby daughter.

So I prayed.  Dear God, let something happen so I can be at home without shirking my other responsibilities, please.  Love, barb

I always pray as if I’m writing a letter.  I don’t know why, but I always have.  And man, was that prayer answered fast.  I woke up the next morning and my ex-husband said to me “Why do you have zits all over your face?”  I have never had an acne problem and I was 27 years old.  Past the high school acne stage, anyway.  I raced to the bathroom mirror, took a horrified look at myself, lifted my pajama shirt and said. “I think I have the chicken pox.”

The doctor told me yes, I had the chicken pox and guess what….your baby has it too.  I said that wasn’t possible.  She didn’t have a dot on her.  He chuckled and said she didn’t YET.  Because I was contagious so it was a fait acompli.

My staying home for 2 weeks became a quarantine for 4 weeks and a very unpleasant one at that.  HAHAHAHAHahahah SO funny……not.

In no way am I making light of anyone’s religious beliefs.  I consider myself a very spiritual person.  My beliefs are based on about 3 different religions squished into a spirituality that is powerful and personal.  I do believe that God, or whatever you call your higher power, is a loving entity that provides clarity, serenity and peace.  And a lot of laughs.

And these “humorous” moments are actually God knocking on my mental/emotional/spiritual door saying HELLLLLLO Anyone with any common sense inside there????  Oops.  My bad.

It’s still hard for me to say nnnnnnnn nyeeeee  NO.  But I’m much better than I used to be. Which is literally a godsend because I never want to have chicken pox again while taking care of a baby who has chicken pox, as well.

So back to the present.  Today started the New York State Regents’ Exams.  I proctor the exams for the ESL students, along with other teachers.  I’m on “late shift” because these kids get extra time accommodations.  I’m not going to go into all the little things that went wrong yes I am like why, when NYS says all work must be in blue or black ink did you think that aqua counted?  Really?  Or, as I was collecting exams and noticed that one student randomly answered 2 questions in Spanish and all the rest in English, which is a big no-no he said “What’s the big deal.”  Seriously?  And I’m not going to bore you yes I am  with how sick I’ve been and how everyone is getting on my nerves and my co-workers want to slap me.  Phew!  Finally, everyone was done with the tests and I could go home.

And then I said those fateful 6 words.  God, what else could go wrong!  I’m guessing that instead of a frustrated expression said in a tired voice, it must have sounded like a prayer meant to be taken literally.  I had just put on my pajamas and made egg salad.  I promptly dropped the egg salad which landed on my pajama shirt, dribbled down my pajama pants and plopped on the floor. That, my friends, was what else could go wrong.  I will always keep on praying. However…..

Note to self: Keep your thoughts to yourself.

 

About Barb Knowles

The things that are important to me are family, friends, teaching, writing, languages and using my sense of humor to navigate this crazy world. Please join me on this blogging adventure...
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34 Responses to What else could go wrong…or God’s sense of humor.

  1. VaSanganyado says:

    Pray, you get well soon.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. lbeth1950 says:

    Great story. Loved it.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Carrie Rubin says:

    Aqua colored ink for an exam? Guess at least it was pretty…

    Hope tomorrow everything goes right for you. At least you can’t get chicken pox again. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Amanda says:

    Just don’t ever pray for patience!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Chris White says:

    Ah, the old egg salad trick. Let’s see … egg salad, chicken (pox) … I’m sensing a theme here! 🐓🐣
    Kris.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hope you are feeling better now 😀 So exams take a toll on the teachers as well 😉 Why not just abolish it?? Not really helping anyone lol 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Bea dM says:

    this is one funny post haha! I’m generically spiritual too, and in my very Buddhist phase my teacher always did say God had a funny sense of humor (I can vouch for it too – with your permission, I might copycat and blog about that one day). I also do ESOL tests, and even when the going’s good and calm, no acqua ink, it’s draining. Do you have a special recipe for egg salad?

    Liked by 1 person

  8. My sister had chicken pox at 23, and despite me taking in her meals and playing scrabble/cards/anything else I never got it.
    Fast forward several years, and the boys I was caring for were sent home from a weekend stay with their mother with chicken pox. Oh boy, did I catch it then! I was 32, and had plenty of offers for applying calamine lotion in those awkward places. yeah, right!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Barb Knowles says:

      Haha, yeah my parents used to send me to play with kids who had the chicken pox and kids with the mumps. Didn’t get either until my bout with chicken pox that I wrote about. Never had the mumps but I had a horrible case of the measles when I was 4. Much worse as an adult, don’t you think?

      Like

  9. When I was young my brother contracted chicken pox and I remember being pissed because I thought he was getting something that I wasn’t. Well, I worried for nothing because, of course, I got the chicken pox a couple of days later. I even had them on the bottom of my feet!

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Mindy says:

    Oof… That sounds rough. I hope things have improved!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. George says:

    Imagine if you didn’t pray?

    Liked by 1 person

    • Barb Knowles says:

      No I can’t…..not for a second….horrors. Sometimes I look up and say “Okay I get it”. Other times it’s “excuse me, I think you have me confused with someone stronger”. haha but for real.

      Liked by 1 person

  12. jasinrockgod says:

    This is so true, even for those of us that do not really have an organized religion. I call it “karma’s dirty tricks”.

    Like

  13. Yeah…God does have a weird sense of humour. And I’m sure He can read your thoughts too. Gasps! You can never run. Ever! 😀 LOL

    Liked by 1 person

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