My Funniest Moment Ever Was In The Hospital

I’m not making fun of people who have strokes, TIAs or any other form of cardiovascular or neurological events.  My mother was invalided for years and years from serious strokes.

But mine happened to be hilarious.

I was hospitalized for my 4th or 5th TIA/mini-stroke on Monday.  I felt all my usual emotions. Am I making a big deal over nothing? Should I ask for a priest? Is whatever happened to me all done and won’t rear its ugly head for another couple of years? Not to mention that I felt guilty because my co-workers went ballistic and made me promise to go to the hospital and never drive to work like that again.

What I didn’t expect was to have probably the funniest moment in my life in the hospital.

Backstory: I was admitted to the hospital for a dizzy spell that caused gait problems which caused me to careen into the bedroom wall and bounce off that into the bureau, have slurred speech, then feel a little better and drive to work.  That’s not the funny part.  

I felt fine-ish after being there all day and the dizziness was gone.  But due to that symptom, I was not allowed to get out of bed and walk without assistance.

hospital bed

Oh please.

At that point, 12 hours later, walking was not my issue.  I understand the reason for the rules, but I knew that I could walk just fine.  Who wouldn’t feel better if they were lying in bed all day? Who would notice if I went to the bathroom? It was like 4 feet away.

I put on the little socks they give you with the suction cups on the bottom.  The sides of the bed were up so I scooted down the bed, swung my legs over the side and got up.

THE BED WAS ATTACHED TO AN ALARM.

sirenAs I stood up, a light over the bed blazed on and off like a strobe light and an alarm screeched so loudly that it caused the staff running down the hall to experience the Doppler effect.  It scared the crap out of me and I quickly and guiltily plopped back down.

A bunch of people ran in and the nurse shook her finger at me.  angry nurse

 

I immediately started texting all of my friends. The funniest moment in my life happened when I had a stroke.

About Barb Knowles

The things that are important to me are family, friends, teaching, writing, languages and using my sense of humor to navigate this crazy world. Please join me on this blogging adventure...
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42 Responses to My Funniest Moment Ever Was In The Hospital

  1. Ok, now I’m terrified for you and laughing my ass off over you at the same time!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. annieg421 says:

    Ha ha that will teach you to do what you are told when they say dont get out of bed without help. 😃😃😃

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Ugh, I hate hospitals! I’m glad you’re okay!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. George says:

    It’s not supposed to be funny but it is..:)

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Bea dM says:

    Take it easy do as you’re told and enjoy lying in bed! The fact you’re laughing and making us all crack up too is good but do slow down please – we still have to meet someday 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Hahahaaaaa! I’m still laughing long after I read your post. Oh my! Imagine the alarm going and going…heee..Hee. Still laughing. 😜 But I can understand – only 4 feet and only to the bathroom; especially after resting the entire time. What’s the deal! Lol. Still laughing! Must.sleep.now. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’ve been a “fall risk” patient before lol. Hospitals take it very serious. They even put it in the doorway so EVERYONE passing by could know that I could fall over at any time 😊

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Glad you’re here to tell the tale. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Paul says:

    “We’ve got a runner” – the doctor’s on their walkie talkies, probably

    Liked by 1 person

  10. tj6james6 says:

    My dad had TIA’s for many years but I can honestly say he never, ever had a bed which went crazy when he tried to get out of it. Apparently they knew you well? Hmmmm, I wonder if they make those for toddlers so they’ll stay in bed at night, or even for their carseats so they’ll stop playing with the seat belt buckles.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Barb Knowles says:

      That’s not a bad idea. Probably traumatizing though. For the car seat it would be awesome. It’s really dangerous when they manage to get out of those. I turned around one day as my grandson unhooked his and had his hand on the door handle. It was baby-proofed, but still scary. Thank you for reading my blog and commenting 😃

      Like

      • tj6james6 says:

        When we moved my older son from a car seat to a booster he absolutely loved to unbuckle his seat belt. I finally had enough when he did it for about the 5th time in a 10 minute car ride, pulling over each time to buckle him back in. He threw a fit when I outsmarted him and put the booster in the trunk and put him back in the car seat :D. He was marginally too large for it but still safer than not being restrained.
        Needless to say, when he went back into the booster seat he kept his hands off the seat belt :D.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Barb Knowles says:

      And as to the “knew me well”…..hmmm. Maybe. I was also several decades younger than the next youngest person. So I’m pretending the precautions were for the other patients.

      Like

  11. lbeth1950 says:

    Big old tattletale!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Garfield Hug says:

    I am sorry on one hand to read about your 4th or 5th mini stroke but could not help laughing. Take care and get well soon. Garfiwld hugs💕

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Almost Iowa says:

    The next time I am in the hospital and my friends ask, “Do you need anything?”, I will say, “Sandbags.”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Barb Knowles says:

      hahaha I thought having alarms go off in a cardiac unit was perhaps not the greatest thing for the other patients. Although it would provide an interesting moment in a place that isn’t known for entertainment. And, if there is a problem, you do want the staff to react promptly. But, man, did it startle me.

      Liked by 1 person

  14. Hahahaha. Well, at least a net didn’t drop down from the ceiling.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Val says:

    Grins. Oh dear, that’s the sort of thing that would happen to me….

    Liked by 1 person

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